Back to the Start
by James Beck
Summary: Loki encounters a young girl one day who intrigues him. She is a spy yet acts different from the others. There are secrets she seems to be hiding and he wants to know them, but what is he willing to go through to uncover all her secrets? First Fanfic! :) Please review and criticize all you want. Need all the advice I can get. Flames (constructive) allowed.
1. First Encounter

_Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry_

_You don't know how lovely you are_

_I had to find you and tell you I need you._

_Tell you I set you apart_

_Tell me your secrets_

_And ask me your questions_

_Oh, let's go back to the start._

_~Scientist by Coldplay_

* * *

CRASH! BAM!

Loki gazed at the ignorant people around him as he calmly walked through the battlefield. Screams echoed through the air and the thud of bodies falling to the grassless ground resonated. What a glorious sound it was.

He smiled. All this because of him. What beauty! He bent down next to one of the fallen soldiers and gently whispered, "Was it worth it? Do you know you're dying for a pampered man to get more money in his pocket?"

The man shuddered as he struggled to breathe but the bullet had wounded his lungs. His hands shook in desperate tremors and his forehead broke out in cold sweat. Loki smoothly stood up and continued walking. The village he was in was unbearably small, nothing compared to his beloved palace back in Asgard.

People were running in and out of the houses. Children were wailing for their parents and scampering around like rats. The smell of smoke and blood hung heavy in the air, and guns seemed to be shooting from all around.

As Loki leisurely walked through the unfolding massacre, he smiled to himself. The amount of confusion and chaos was overwhelmingly pleasurable. Out of the corner of his eye, he suddenly saw something. A whizz of red hair zoomed past his view and a sudden curiosity filled him. What was a red head doing in the Middle East?

He quickly changed into a ten year old boy with pale skin and dark hair and eyes, and he followed the girl around the corner. People shoved past him and he growled at all the people who ran into him. As much as he liked chaos, he preferred momentary peace when he was in such a vulnerable state. Midgardians.

The red head girl was leaning against one of the walls and looking around with an eerie sense of calmness on her face. Her nine year old luminous brown eyes sparkled with excitement and Loki blinked in surprise. This was supposed to be scary not comical.

He walked over to her and she took a step back with a grin still on her face.

"What are you smiling about?" Loki asked.

"People." She said simply, locking her hands behind her back. "They are so afraid of dying. It's funny to see them. Don't they know that to die earlier would be better than to die with leaving so much behind."

"What do you mean?" Loki frowned. This girl must be crazy.

"When you are small, you have nothing to lose." The girl articulated carefully. "When you are old, you are in love, there are people around you that love you, and you have a family and friends."

Loki studied her carefully. This girl was obviously not like the others, besides her red hair that was different from everybody else's. Her brown eyes held a subtle sparkle in them, but he couldn't figure out the sadness behind them.

"So you want to die?"

"No." the girl smirked. Another explosion echoed in the background.

"Are you human?" Loki sneered. This girl was interesting; not only had she puzzled him, the god of mischief and lies, but she did it to where he had absolutely no idea what she was suggesting through her cryptic words.

"Are _you_ human?" the girl countermanded. "I don't see you with any signs of having starved or fought." She poked at his ribcage.

Loki glared at the girl. Despite being annoying, she was frustratingly smart.

Before he said anything, he sensed the precognition of a bomb going off. He threw himself on the girl, wrapping his arms around her and covered her as shards of glass and wood drove into his back. The girl's chocolate eyes widened as his face scrunched up in pain. Midgardians were so easy to fool.

"Let go of me, you idiot." She gasped as she turned him around to see the wounds. Loki smiled inwardly as she gasped at the glass embedded in his back. Her hands seemed to be unable to move for a second, and then he felt one of the pieces being slowly extracted from his back.

"Stop," Loki sharply ordered, turning away from her.

"You have glass in your back!" she snarled, frustrated. As she reached for it again, a voice shouted,

"Natasha!"

The girl turned to the voice and Loki took advantage of the moment to disappear and transport himself on top of the building. He watched as a boy with a bow on his back came running towards the girl. _Natasha_.

"Clint, I thought you were at the van already." Natasha said. Her voice lowered. Clint shrugged before nodding, leading her away from the scene. Natasha looked back to try to find the stranger who had helped her but she was met with empty air.

"Natasha," Loki tried out the name softly and silently followed the duo of friends weave their way through the crowd and towards a white van that was driving towards the entrance of the city.

Clint and Natasha flagged it down and it stopped, letting them in. Loki's eyes widened as he caught the sight of guns in there. He materialized closer to hear what Natasha and Clint were saying to the strangers.

"The suspect is dead," Clint confirmed, "Natasha made sure I got out in time to not get hit by the bomb." He flashed her smile, but all she returned was a firm nod. The man gave them a pat on the back and turned back to the driver.

"The spies are here." The man snapped, "Hurry up and drive."

So this strange little girl Natasha was a spy. How… peculiar. How exciting. He could only imagine the thrill of being a spy at such a young age. Where had she gone? She seemed to be experienced in this sort of thing. He really must ask her more about her interesting occupation.

As he transported back to Asgard, he was caught by Heimdall, the gatekeeper, who gave him a distrustful look.

"Loki, while on your visit to Earth, you were blurred from my vision." He said softly. Loki could hear the warning tone lying underneath.

"How strange, Heimdall," Loki cocked his head to the side, frowning, "Could it be you're getting old and are losing your sight?" Heimdall scowled and Loki went back to Odin's palace Gladseim laughing.

Even as his brother Thor caught up with him telling him about the new trick he had learned with his hammer, all Loki could think about was Natasha and her strange words. Maybe he could go back to Midgard and talk to her.

Loki frowned, shaking his head as he realized the thoughts running through his head. Why did he suddenly want to see Natasha again? What was so special about her?

"Is something troubling you, brother?" Thor frowned, placing a hand on Loki's shoulder.

"No, Thor," Loki smiled tightly, "Tell me more about your trick." Thor didn't hesitate into plunging into his rant again and didn't realize until much later that Loki had zoned out again.

_ I will visit her tomorrow. _Loki thought, nodding his head.


	2. Ticket Out

_I will stand by you_  
_I will help you through_  
_When you've done all you can do_  
_If you can't cope_  
_I will dry your eyes_  
_I will fight your fight_  
_I will hold you tight_  
_And I won't let go_

_It hurts my heart_  
_To see you cry_  
_I know it's dark_  
_This part of life_  
_Oh it finds us all_  
_And we're too small_  
_To stop the rain_  
_Oh but when it rains_

_I will stand by you_  
_I will help you through_  
_When you've done all you can do_

_~I Won't Let You Go by Rascal Flatts_

* * *

Natasha Romanoff knew her role as spy in Russia and in America. She had been drilled with secret codes ever since she could walk and she knew how dangerous it would be if she were caught. Usually she could slip past the crowd and remain unsuspected. The last mission though had almost been compromised. The boy with pale skin and dark hair had seen her and had even talked to her.

"Nat, what are you thinking about?" Clint asked from across the room. The sound of his bow's string being plucked echoed through the empty room. Their other two roommates were on a mission.

"A boy stopped to talk to me on our last mission." She confessed, staring up at the dark ceiling.

Clint leaned up on his elbows, frowning.

"What did he say?"

"He asked me why I was smiling." Natasha smirked.

"You were smiling?" Clint made a shocked face. Natasha threw a pillow at him.

"I was thinking about the suspect's face when he figured out that we were assassins."

"Masochist."

"Oh, haha. Haha." Natasha rolled her eyes and laid back down in bed.

"Okay, I'm sorry." Clint grinned, "Did the boy ask you what you were doing?"

"No. But he did save my life."

"What?!" Clint shot up and turned to face her completely.

"A bomb exploded near us and he covered me from the glass. It was so weird." Natasha shook her head as she remembered the boy's arms around her. He had protected her even though he didn't have a single clue who she was. Something inside her warmed at the thought that someone was willing to risk their life for hers.

Before Clint could ask more, the door opened and Natasha and Clint darted to their feet. Their commanding officer, Officer Duncan, stepped into the room and they saluted her.

"At ease." She said, saluting them back. "Barton, you can go back to bed. This is for Romanoff only. Follow me, Romanoff." Officer Duncan sharply turned from the room and began walking down the hallway. Natasha cast Clint a worried glance and closed the door behind her. What use could they have of her this late at night?

She silently followed her officer and was surprised when they began to head down the Director's hallway to his department.

"Romanoff, you've been given a great honor to meet Director Lysenski. Do not talk back, and do not speak to him until he has spoken to you. You are representing Quarter 37 when you meet him so do not disappoint me."

"Yes, ma'am."

Officer Duncan opened the door and let Natasha in.

Natasha kept a cool face as she walked through the door and stood next to the chair in front of the desk. On the other side, there was a black leather chair turned away from her.

As the door behind her closed, the chair turned and the man occupying it smirked.

"I've been expecting you." His blue eyes looked down at her as he stood up and laughed. He bent over letting out a loud laugh. Natasha would've put a shocked face on had she not been so trained in the art of discretion. Why was he laughing?

"No I'm just kidding," the man sighed happily as he grabbed her shoulder and squeezed it. "I've always wanted to do that. I am Director Lysenski. You can talk freely in my presence."

"Yes, sir." Natasha nodded.

"Romanoff, you have shown excellent skill and dedication in Quarter 37." His serious voice was back on and he sat down in the chair signaling for her to do the same. "Every year we choose the top of every Quarter and send them in a special training in America. It doesn't consist of martial arts or guns. We are sending you to be adopted by a family."

Natasha waited for him to continue but he remained silent, smiling. He was waiting for her to ask something.

"Am I going to spy on them?" she asked.

"No." Lysenski shook his head, folding his hands above his stomach. His dark hair fell across his eyes. "This is just another normal family from the U.S.A. that wants a ten year old girl. Here's their file." He slid a manila file across the table.

Natasha frowned in confusion as she leafed through the file in a flash. This couple was just a pair of ordinary people. Their criminal record was clean. The worst thing they had done was accidently run into the neighbor's mailbox which they paid for.

"Sir, I don't understand what my mission is."

"Your mission is to go live with them for a year, and then you will come back and we will see what to do with you next." Director Lysenski's voice was laced with impatience. This guy must have random mood swings. One minute he was laughing like an idiot, and the next he was at the verge of lashing out.

"Yes, sir."

"Here's your plane ticket."

Director Lysenski handed her the slip of paper and nodded her towards the door.

"See you in a year, Romanoff."

* * *

This was the worst thing that had ever happened.

Natasha sighed as she waved off another waitress who was offering peanuts. Did she have some kind of sign saying that she looked like she could use some peanuts? She wasn't a freaking elephant!

So far she had been the first one to board the plane and there were other people scattered around her. Officer Duncan has been the one to drive her to the airport and hand her a bagful of new clothes and extra necessities she might need, including a taser, gun, and a few handy knives. The usual.

Natasha had been whisked off without even the chance to say good bye to Clint. Her heart hurt at the guilt. They had always been close ever since he recruited her to be an American spy instead of a Russian one. She could still remember when he had arrived to kill her.

_ A light rain cloud slid across the sky, and Natasha turned her face up to feel the rain drops slide down her face. She had chosen this building because she knew no one would disturb them up here. _

_ She smirked. Of course she knew about the boy who had been hired to kill her. It wasn't rocket science when he suddenly began appearing everywhere she went. She recognized him as one of the Young American spies._

_ She felt him pointing the arrow her way and she calmly stood up and turned around to face him. A gun hung loosely in her hand._

_ His eyebrows raised in surprise when he realized she had known all along he had been behind her. He pointed his arrow at her._

_ "Do it." She said softly, "If you don't, I will." She put the gun to her head._

_ "No!" he exclaimed, keeping his bow and arrow up just in case it was a trick._

_ "Why not? Wouldn't it just make your job easier?" She pitifully laughed, as tears began to slide down her cheeks. "You could have one less person on your conscience."_

_ He paused for a second._

_ "Don't do this." He repeated. "You aren't like this."_

_ "What do you want me to do? If you don't kill me, I will be forced to kill more innocent people!" Natasha screamed, her eyes sparking in anger._

_ "Come with me." He shouted above the pouring rain, "Work with the U.S. Wipe your ledger clean."_

_ She hesitated for a second. He held out his hand, signaling for her to hand him the gun. She handed it over, wondering why he hadn't just killed her. _

Natasha shivered as she remembered how guilty she had felt when she figured out the people she was killing weren't bad. They were just in the way of the people she had worked for. Now… now she knew she was fighting for the good side.

She looked around her, looking to see if any more people had come onto the plane. As she began to turn back around, a crowd of kids began to file in. She stopped and looked at them. They were a group of rowdy looking kids. She prayed to God that she wouldn't have to sit next to one of them.

"C37?" one of the boys roughly asked her as he approached her. Natasha sighed in relief.

"No. It's more in front." She pointed up a few seats.

As they passed by her, she overheard two of the boys talking to each other.

"My mom was killed by a bomb and my dad was buried under a building. I wonder who attacked us."

"I heard there was a big time drug dealer someone wanted dead."

Natasha turned to the voices and studied their faces. Their skin was tanned and she recognized their accent. They were part of the village she had been sent to.

"Hey!" She bolted from her seat and ran over to the duo who looked at her in confusion, "Why are there so many of you?"

"We are orphans of Dilmun. It was attacked and we are being sent to the U.S. to get new families."

Natasha nodded and went back to her seat. She sat down at her window seat and leaned against the glass, closing her eyes. This is why Director Lysenski had put her in this plane. There were many orphans and she would easily blend into the crowd.

"Well, look who it is."

Natasha's eyes snapped open as she turned to the voice. She was stunned to find herself staring into a pair of amused green eyes. A lock of his black hair fell across his eyes as he looked down next her and smiled. It was the boy who had saved her!

"I think your name was Natasha?" he grinned.

"Who are you?"

"Loki Alder at your service."


	3. Card Trickster

"You're the one who saved me!" Natasha stood up in shock. Loki smirked and slid his bags in the shelf above them.

"Well, that's a bit of a stretch!" Loki shrugged as he sat down next to her.

Natasha stared incredulously at him and sat down next to him. She never thought she would see him again, but there he was. He waited for her to say something. Shaking her head, she cleared her throat. Her mind switched back to spy mode.

"Why were you in Dilmun? Were you stalking me?" She asked quietly under her breath. Her mind went back to Clint and his mission to kill her. What country would this boy be sent from?

"No," Loki laughed, his green eyes sparkling in amusement, "I was there on a mission trip for my church. Dilmun was the city my church chose."

"Oh, really?" she raised her eyebrows. "You're kind of young for going across the Earth all by yourself."

He shook his head, smiling.

"No. I was in a mission group. Here let me introduce you to two of them. Zachary! Hoshi!"

Two heads popped up three rows behind where Natasha and Loki were sitting.

"What, Loki?"

"Let me introduce you to the girl I was talking about earlier." He grinned, standing up in the aisle so we could all see each other. Natasha slid out and studied the two boys carefully.

"This is Natasha." Loki signaled me.

The taller one with a well-built structure stepped up first and stuck his hand out. He had shaggy blonde hair and olive green eyes that had an excited sparkle in them. His hand was wrapped in a white bandage.

"'ello, Tasha. You don't mind if I call you that, do you?" He didn't pause to hear her answer. "My name is Zachary. Loki told us about you. You're the girl who made Loki lose half his back. But after looking at you, I can see it was so worth it." He winked, flashing her a smile. Loki pushed him aside, letting the shorter one talk.

This one had a more pensive look on his face and he hesitated before sticking out his hand at her. He looked Chinese by the looks of it with his drawn out black eyes and slicked back raven hair.

"Hello, Natasha." He said quietly, shaking her hand.

"Hoshi, I suppose?" She asked, retracting her hand quickly. He gave her the creeps. And that was a lot to say for a spy.

"Yes."

An awkward silence filled the group and Zachary cleared his throat.

"Well, we're gonna go back to our seats. Don't have too much fun!" He punched Loki playfully on the shoulder. Hoshi and Zachary turned and went back to their seats.

"You're very paranoid, aren't you?" Loki asked as they sat back down in their seats. She shrugged.  
"Where are you going?" Natasha asked, as she offered him a pack of peanuts. He took them graciously and began eating them.

"I'm going to Silvestre, Texas. Two hours away from Fort Worth which by the way is where we'll be landing." He coughed when he breathed in the salty aroma of the package.

"Seriously?" She frowned. This was too much of a coincidence.

"I'm not joking. Why? Are you going there too?" He asked, tilting his head. She growled at his continued avoidance of the subject. Maybe he had to wait until they were in the U.S.A. There must be somebody waiting over there, ready to torture her for information. Those two boys was his threat! Even if she tried to escape, those two would be there. She would have to keep quiet until they reached ground.

"I swear!" He laughed, standing up to get his bag. Once he got his bag, he opened it and handed her his papers. Which was extremely odd for a spy to do. A spy knew what fake papers were and to hand it to another was like handing in your death certificate.

As she glanced over his papers, she was shocked to see they were real papers. Everything was as expected and she couldn't find the signs of it being forged.

"But-" She stammered.

"What? Are you a spy?" Loki studied her carefully.

She laughed.

"No. But I was wondering what a boy like you with such pale skin was doing in Dilmun." Natasha cursed herself for letting herself slip. What was going on with her?

"The same could go for you. A red head isn't very common." Loki shot back, crossing his arms. "I think you're a spy."

"Of course I am." She sneered sarcastically, turning away from him. He was being annoying now.

"Okay, look. I'm sorry." Loki said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Let's start over. Hi, I'm Loki Alder. It's nice to know my seating partner isn't a person who might slober all over me if they go to sleep."

Natasha smiled.

"I'm Natasha Lysenski." She made sure to use her fake name. "It's nice to know my partner isn't someone with a lot of bags at their feet, giving me no space to move." Loki cracked her a grin.

"So, why are you heading to Fort Worth?" he asked, tilting his head. She tucked a stran d of red hair behind her ear. His green eyes followed her every move, studying her. It unnerved her.

"I'm an orphan of Dilmun and I'm being sent to be adopted by an American family. They don't live in Fort Worth; they actually live in a small city two hours away from there. Silvestre." She explained carefully, shrugging.

"Whoa." Loki laughed, "That's strange. You see, I live there and I happen to know a family who had been wanting to adopt a family. By any chance, is the family that wants to adopt you called the Chollets?"

Natasha blinked in surprise. Her suspicion of him being a spy rose again but she pushed it down.

"Yes." She grinned. She gave him a coy look. "Are you stalking me?"

"I'll never tell." He teased. She stuck her tongue out at him.

"This is like in the movies! I happen to meet someone going to the same place as me _and_ they happen to know who is going to adopt me." She placed a hand on her cheek , looking up in wonder. Pretending to be an ordinary girl was tiring.

"They're my neighbors actually." Loki smiled. "This is a very small town you are going to."

"Oh."

"It's nice to meet you, neighbor." He gave her a small smile.

"Nice to meet you too." She nodded. "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"

Loki's face darkened at the thought of Thor. He was always the favored one ampng the ladies. If he were to talk about him, Natasha would like Thor more.

"Yes. I have an older brother, Thor." He turned away to look at the other people.

"Your parents are really into Norse legends." She laughed.

"You could say that." Loki shrugged.

Before either of them could say anything the pilot began to talk about procedures over the intercom. Loki took the chance to take out a deck of cards from thin air without anyone noticing.

"Do you want to see a card trick?" He turned back to Natasha.

She shrugged.

"Here you hold this card. Memorize it. Don't show it to me." Loki gave her a random card out of the stack, closing his eyes.

"Okay. I have it." Natasha said.

Loki grinned and opened his eyes. He shuffled the cards in his hands and took the top one.

"Now, I want you to hold it with the back towards me." She held it up. Loki passed his card in front of hers with the color facing her and used magic to switch the numbers from one card to the other.

Natasha's eyes widened as she realized the card wasn't the same. Loki flashed her the card, smiling. She gaped at him.

"How'd you do that?" She demanded, yawning. A sudden drowsiness came over her. She leaned towards Loki. "That was so amazing. You have a real talent."

"Thanks." He shrugged.

"How?" She yawned, dosing off. She tried to fight it off.

"A trickster never tells his secrets. Nor does a spy." Loki said softly as she fell on him in complete sleep. He was pretty sure the last words never reached her ears. As he laid her back against the chair, one of the flight attendants came over.

"Is she alright?" the lady asked.

"Yeah." Loki nodded. "I was just getting her into a more comfortable position."

The lady nodded and turned away.

Loki made a copy of himself, leaving it on Midgard, and transported himself back to Asgard back to his older version. Heimdall was annoying as usual, commenting about Loki's strange blur, but Loki just walked past him without saying an insult. His mind was too preoccupied with the thought of Natasha.

She was an interesting girl. When Loki had been introducing her to his illusions of Fandral and Hogan, she had been cautious. Fandral's compliments annoyed her a bit. He could tell by the slight twitch of her jaw. Hogan's stare had unnerved her. Her hand had been shaking when she drew back her hand.

When Loki turned the corner to his bedroom, he was surprised to find a crying Sif at his door. He quickly strode over to her and kneeled down beside her, tucking back a strand of her blonde hair. She looked up at him with teary eyes.

"He did it again, didn't he?" Loki softly asked. He pulled her up to her feet and led her into his bedroom.

Sif nodded and sat down in the chair next to his desk.

"And you still love him?" Loki hissed, pacing.

"Thor's still growing up." Sif weakly protested. Loki snickered.

"Lady Sif, he's 733 years old. I think he's more than grown up." Loki clenched his fists.

Fifty years ago Sif had come to him asking him about Thor. After a few monthes of the non-stop badgering, Loki realized she was in love with Thor. He also began to notice how badly Thor treated Sif. Thor treated her as if she was just one of the other guys.

"What did he say this time?" Loki asked, sitting down on his bed, facing her.

"Fandral and Thor were sparring and Fandral said that my hair looked pretty today, you know, flirting with the closest female to him and Thor looked over at me. He said that he hadn't noticed. He said my blonde hair was practically invisible."Sif choked, pressing her hands on her eyes.

"He practically insulted you to the face." Loki shook his head. "What did Fandral say?"

"I don't know. I left, saying I needed to go do something." Sif sniffed, wiping the last traces of tears from her face.

"I'm sorry my brother doesn't' realize what's in front of him." Loki apologized, taking her hands in his, looking up at her. "If there is anything I can do, Lady Sif, do not hesitate to ask."

"Loki, change my hair color. Turn it red." Sif begged, squeezing his hands. Loki stared at her and shook his head, standing up, "I've seen Thor looking at red heads at the parties!"

"Lady Sif, you look beautiful just the way you are. Don't change for my brother."

"I want Thor, and I will go through anything to have his attention on me if even for a second." Sif stood to her feet and Loki could feel the tension rising the room.

"I will do it… but I do not know how to change it back. My magic cannot be overlapped. If I use my magic to change your hair color once, my magic will be embedded in the roots of your hair, and if I try to change it back, the old magic and the new one will react." Loki explained.

"Make it red. A dark red like blood." She said excitedly. Loki tiredly looked at her. She didn't seem to grasp the full extent of how exhausting and dangerous this thing could be. He could destroy whatever brain she had left.

"Sit down." He ordered. "You owe me one though." Sif nodded and sat down in the chair he had conjured. Loki took a lock of her hair, testing it out. It was smooth and light blonde like the rays of Asgardian suns.

He conjured a pair of scissors and swiftly cut off a full lock of hair. Sif yelped and gasped as she felt the short hair in the back.

"What are you doing?!"

"You think your hair is ugly because Thor said it but you don't know what everybody else says. Freyja herself is jealous of your hair. I'm going to keep this to remind you if you come crying that Thor doesn't' like it." Loki darkly scowled as he forced her to sit down again. He regenerated her hair to match length. He slid the blonde lock of hair into his pocket.

He took a calming breath and placed his hands on her head. Magic flowed through him and he began turning her hair red. The roots were beginning to change and it was changing into a dark blood red at an excruciatingly slow pace.

The doors slammed open and out of the corner of his eye, Loki saw Fandral and Thor rushing in with shocked faces. Loki knew that they thought he was forcing her to do this and they ran at ramming speed to knock him off his feet. Using all of his strength, he forced the magic through and the last thing he remembered was his head against the marble floor.


End file.
